Advice Do You Need Some Relationship Advice?

Spock said:
Triggered. I used to have a bf like that. it was a nightmare
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That’s gotta be a crazy experience. everyone can have mental health issues and breakdowns. this has been called a manipulation abuse tactic males and women use to prey on your love/concern. I do think it is usually a sign that can come along early.

Abuse tactics I mean. I can see signs of them early on and my personal peace means a lot so I steer clear as fast as possible.

Closest situation I’ve seen of something like this is actually online.

Forum /online wise / not nf afaik

I remember this really weird guy who went to another anime forum would always say really out of pocket weird stuff as a ploy for attention. He would often say no one care about him and he’s gonna harm himself. It got some ppl to sympathize with him and from the gist of it .I was out. I wanted no part of someone who is gonna get on a forum with strangers and make these statements.

I think the most someone should do in that situation is call the suicide prevention program or something. And tell everyone he knows. contact his mom ,sis ,uncles ,cousins, every adult he knows in his family. everyone you know and tell them about it. Make it their priority as his family to get him help or to call the manipulation out. Cuz if it’s not real you really embarrass him or make him uncomfortable when his family knows. Could gather them all to him immediately and they are responsible for caring about their family member and should show up. And maybe they take on the burden for you.
hard to say cuz it’s so heavy
 
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pfft said:
I think the most someone should do in that situation is call the suicide prevention program or something. And tell everyone he knows. contact his mom ,sis ,uncles ,cousins, every adult he knows in his family. everyone you know and tell them about it. Make it their priority as his family to get him help or to call the manipulation out. Cuz if it’s not real you really embarrass him or make him uncomfortable when his family knows. Could gather them all to him immediately and they are responsible for caring about their family member and should show up. And maybe they take on the burden for you.
hard to say cuz it’s so heavy
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I don't necessarily disagree with alerting people's families but embarrassing them shouldn't be one of the motives.

I'm of the view that if someone is threatening to commit suicide, that in and of itself is a problem whether they mean to go through with it, whether they're looking for attention, whether they're looking to manipulate someone.

I don't see how it helps them to create a situation where they're uncomfortable and awkward around their family.
 
Yeah, I don't think it could be the right thing telling everyone that is close to that individual about their suicidal ideations.
You don't know how those individuals will react, and at worse, they may handle it in a screwed manner.

imo Staying with them and heavily encouraging them to go and speak with a suicide prevention program should be done since it's something that they specialize in. I'm not sure about the realms of confidentiality they are allowed, since the person is expressing, they want to harm their self/take their own life.
 
Gunners said:
I don't necessarily disagree with alerting people's families but embarrassing them shouldn't be one of the motives.
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I only say it is an embarrassment if someone were using this as a tactic or a manipulation. Because I would be embarrassed by my actions if my goal was not suicide but to attempt to make the person I’m with to stay in a relationship they want out of.

And if my partner is going to contact all of my family to be concerned and gather around me and take precautions etc…

. It is a good move to make to give weight to their words and make them face the reality of what was said

Gunners said:
I'm of the view that if someone is threatening to commit suicide, that in and of itself is a problem whether they mean to go through with it, whether they're looking for attention, whether they're looking to manipulate someone.
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It’s a tricky thing. the gravity of suicidal tendencies ideations and depression is difficult to engage especially with someone you are with and have a relationship with.

I’m just going off of the scenario is ; someone who is my bf/gf threatens to kill themselves because I don’t want to be with them anymore.
Gunners said:
I don't see how it helps them to create a situation where they're uncomfortable and awkward around their family.
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well that depends on their mental faculties and discerning whether or not someone is in so much pain they are ready to do something drastic or if they are
Saying this so you stay in a relationship you don’t want to be in anymore. Both ?

Cheating on them isn’t the answer.

you are not responsible for someone else’s death if they say “ I’ll kill myself if you leave “
 
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This is something I would ever expect..

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Damn their teeth are all on point.
 
Welp. Sorry, guys — I logged out, and six months passed. Shiiiit.
Flow said:
Hope you have been well brother
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It's up and down, man. Hope you've been all right, if not well.
Yamato said:
It devolved into weird topics when DDJ wasn't around for a week and more :hestonpls
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Kind of like before, then.
UtahCrip said:
yeah that shit dropped. it was very eye opening. you should see the way this dude be eating fries.
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I'm curious but don't want curiosity to kill me. My ex ate pizza with a fork and knife, though, so I'm pretty tanky to this stuff.
Magic said:
Yeah the good parts. Outside of that it has devolved into infighting and bitterness i think.

Show is on Netflix check it out you will spot him right away.
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Ah, I hope the infighting didn't result in anyone being too picked on. I'll probably check out the show. Or, I'll just YT "Love on the Spectrum fries."
 
HOLY. I just started watching a clip, and DDJ is saying exactly I would have expected him to say. But also, he's hilarious and comes off as trying to be authentic. You know what, I'm going to shut up now and unblock DJJ until I once again can no longer handle his posts. Best of luck, DDJ ...
 
David said:
Google couldn't find which character I should look up, but Chatgpt is based, apparently.

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That character ain't DDJ. Sounds like that's from an earlier Australian series. Just watch the American trailer from 2022 and it should be immediately clear from that which person is DDJ.
 
Weird. It's not this guy?
He talks about his brother in this video, and if I recall right, in another, he has a preference for Anglo-Saxon things. I'll look up that American trailer for 2022 and see ...
 
David said:
Weird. It's not this guy?
He talks about his brother in this video, and if I recall right, in another, he has a preference for Anglo-Saxon things. I'll look up that American trailer for 2022 and see ...
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Look up Love on the Spectrum ugh compilation. Should be the first one :mjlol
 
David said:
Weird. It's not this guy?
He talks about his brother in this video, and if I recall right, in another, he has a preference for Anglo-Saxon things. I'll look up that American trailer for 2022 and see ...
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Ngl i fucking died you are looking at some UK version or something … damn you jumped the gun
 
DDJ is far more interesting than pages of arguing that is essentially "women do this when dating" "You're wrong, it's men that do this". Gender war thread. Keep that shit in the cafe.
 
Vagrant Tom said:
DDJ is far more interesting than pages of arguing that is essentially "women do this when dating" "You're wrong, it's men that do this". Gender war thread. Keep that shit in the cafe.
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you need to up your standards for what’s interesting. HBO is now called Max maybe they got something for you
 
Vagrant Tom said:
DDJ is far more interesting than pages of arguing that is essentially "women do this when dating" "You're wrong, it's men that do this". Gender war thread. Keep that shit in the cafe.
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This is probably the only place dedicated to where people talk about their dating/relationship experiences.

There are gender wars in the Cafe, but they don't really go into these types of topics.
 
David said:
Made me chuckle with a genuine smile on my face. A great interaction.

Ha. It's still different, seeing his face and hearing him talk to his parents(?). I'm going to try to be more understanding ...
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Yeah. Do your best. Don’t push yourself too hard. But just understand autistic people do deal w some stuff but also a lot of autistic people have an issue with the show and say the series indantilizes the people in it. Especially Abbey and her mom. But they also point out the music they choose to play and editing to make autistic people sound slower or not normal.
You can find autistic people with their valid points on why they find the show problematic online
 
Flow said:

Would do the same shit hahahaha

Edit:

@Vagrant Tom
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It’s ok to not want a girl who doesn’t align with your values of paying for a date. You just keep looking for someone who is willing to pay half.

It doesn’t make a girl a gold digger or ratchet or a hoe because she expects a man to pay.

And it’s equally ok for that girl to just move on and find another guy who is about paying for the girls food and being a gentleman etc.

And she can look at the tiktok situation like “ he’s a cheap broke bitch “ but she doesn’t need to judge the man for his choice either. Just keep it moving. she should keep it pushing and move on maybe even leave the date altogether and just find another one with her interests.

It’s the staying part for me that just doesn’t make sense and it’s a big waste of time for both people. You can find someone who will do what you want just move along and choose that. Instead of harboring some sad little petty crap that you have to carry it like a chip on your shoulder … and make tik tok videos about it lol
 
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