Is it appropriate to get emotional over your lack of a certain material object? Desperately desiring an object you cannot have, cannot touch, that--despite your best efforts, your desire continues to effortlessly elude you while remaining easily accessible to others.

The United States, especially the middle portion, is a vehicular culture. Those who lack vehicles lack mobility and thus freedom. You really won't understand this unless you live out here. There is almost no way to live independently off of public transportation and your feet.

I, since age 16, have had neither vehicle nor drivers license. I need either of them, desperately. While I admit that I might be more than a bit immature about the whole thing do you think you could understand how much not having one -galls- me?

I talked with my mother about this anxiety a few weeks ago, and she didn't understand. She didn't have a car while in school--why should I be bothered? I can get rides to places, why worry about paying for gasoline and insurance?

Because...I want to. I want to be able to get a job anywhere I damn please without having to beg rides from other people. I want to be the one in control. The passenger must always assent to the driver. I hate being the passenger; it galls my stereotypical male ego to no end.

And when you've been brewing gall in the pit of your stomach for seven years, it is quite a bitter draught